Fuck the third quarter.
Cried today; not why you think though.
Krista’s Story:
She’ll probably be unhappy to learn I posted this.
But if she’s gonna slander and hurt me; I’m going to write out my feelings.
That’s why this is here.
I would say this is libel, but I’ll be being honest.
So; Krista and I are rather physical.
About 2 weeks ago I just wanted to make sure that was cool and all.
It’s 2020, consent is important; I’m not trying to catch a case.
I just want her to be comfortable and happy.
So I ask; she has trouble giving a straight answer.
Eventually I tell her I have to stop bc I need a clear and definite yes.
2 days of fighting and she finally yes.
I wasn’t looking for consent or pressuring her, I just wanted one clear answer, whatever it may be.
Few days later; new week.
I ask Julian to get the scoop; bad on me, but i’m glad I did.
He talks to her; she paints our relationship as one sided.
I know there might be societal pressure or emotional hurt, but she’s making me come of as a creep.
More importantly, it hurts my feelings; like she’s ashamed to associate with me.
I told her both these things.
I come of as a predator, or like you don’t care about me.
I understand that’s not how she feels.
I don’t want a relationship is a with a frozen pushpin.
I don’t know how many people she’s told this to; I used to trust her.
Unfortunately, to protect herself she’s really hurting me.
Its selfish.
Its hurtful.
I don’t want that in my life.
All she needs to tell people is that we’re good friends.
She can’t bring herself to say that; then I can’t bring myself to hold up my end of this seesaw relationship.
At this point, I don’t want to lose her as a friend; I love her.
She’s being selfish; we both aren’t being empathetic enough.
I’m here to vibe; she’s really emotionally hurting me.
Two final nails in the coffin that I can’t expose her for but ought to remember:
All that cake.
Unloved tenant.
Mom’s Story:
I love my mom.
This is why I cried.
Krista clearly played a roll in it.
I just haven’t had a conversation with my mom that hasn’t been about grades or volunteering in so long.
It made me sad.
So I cried; we talked.
I love my family.
Although this is the shorter story it is the sweeter, and ultimately more important one.
No matter what happens, my family has my back forever.
Lola’s birthday tomorrow.
Braces off in 2 days.
Arden